I was four centimeters dilated and in active labor with my first child when I successfully pitched our startup’s $5 million seed round. Two years later, I closed our $10 million Series A just seven days after giving birth to my second child.

These are the kinds of stories about ambitious women that we love to celebrate. The startup founder who pumps in the airport bathroom on her way to a client meeting (been there). The seasoned executive who barely misses a beat through perimenopausal brain fog and hot flashes. The new mom who’s back to work just a few weeks after giving birth, stitches burning and breasts leaking (been there, too).

I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished, and I’m in awe of the women out there doing it all—and doing it well. But I have begun to wonder what exactly we are celebrating when we tell these stories, and whether there might be a bit of patriarchy hiding in the applause.

Because while I was navigating some of the most consequential moments of my professional life, I was also experiencing a level of mental, physical, and emotional vulnerability that was entirely new to me.

I have always been someone who can handle pressure. Stressful jobs are nothing new to me. And running a startup means confronting high-stakes situations and ambiguity daily. Usually, I address it, solve it, and move on.

When I was pregnant and postpartum, I was still able to do all of those things, but my experience of doing them had changed.

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