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I lost a cushy engineering management position at the same time I purchased a business, with a mortgage, three kids, and every other financial obligation of being an adult. It was one of the most stressful stretches of my life. If something similar has happened to you, I feel your pain.

For many of us, our work became our identity, so we don’t just think, “I don’t have a job anymore.” We start thinking, “I’m not an engineer anymore.”

An apple tree in winter is still an apple tree. A car parked in a driveway is still a car. You’re still an engineer, the same way you were still one every evening you clocked out, and the same way you’ll be one at the next job. Your skills took years to build and won’t evaporate because a company stopped paying for them. This feeling can be particularly rough if part of your identity was tied to a recognizable employer.

However, this can also be a chance to catch up on what you’ve been putting off: working out, being present with your kids, writing, whatever hobby got shelved for a deadline three years ago.

Once you’ve caught your breath, here are some tips for when the actual work starts:

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